Seattle Press on Line - Capitol Hill Conspiracy Theories

Capitol Hill Conspiracy Theories

By Julie Reinhardt

Nov 21, 2001 -- I recently stomped over to my old stomping grounds: Capitol Hill. Little did I know there was a conspiracy going on right under our nose rings Aliens? You ask. And how, I reply. I don't care what my shrink says, the places I visited were full of conspiracy, intrigue, double agents and possibly extraterrestrial life. I would spell it all out for you, but as we've learned from the X-Files, any good conspiracy takes about five years to explain. Admittedly, some of the places I visited just had out of this world stuff made right here on planet earth. For now, I give you the clues to investigate yourself with the hope that you, reader, will uncover far more than this space would allow.

The Demolition Studio window decor.

My first clue was outside a place called the Demolition Studio. What was my clue? Well, a big picture of an alien, actually. Behind the masked window are Pat Kane and Gabe Palmer, two nice folks from Connecticut that have been trying (read: pleading) for building permits for eight months. "We originally envisioned a multi-faceted, 'image' based facility. We dubbed it imagiNation and saw our 12 windows as a sort of sidewalk gallery along with a continuous-loop slide show," stated Pat Kane. Numerous "zoning conflicts" have forced them to redefine that vision for the space, even though they feel they reasonably meet the requirements. "Some people feel the city council is interested in extending downtown up through Capitol Hill--Baby Gaps and Toys R Us and the like. We're artists and who wants to encourage that?" Pulling up the foundation and leveling a hillside sidewalk are some of the worst-case scenarios for making the gallery/studio/art factory work. Due to the financial drain from the waiting game, they have returned to their commercial successes like FACES, an alternative portrait business, and three stationery lines. One of these, Postcards of the Moon ("Places you know you've been, but can't remember when"), was born out of a year-long road odyssey with their son, Max. The trek took them to Area 51 and Roswell, NM, where they visited the remaining now-famous secret wreckage, and which inspired their current window front. Kane stated that visiting these places would make anyone a believer. "There is clearly activity there unlike anyone's ever seen." What they will do with their space is still up in the air but, says Kane, "Whatever we wind up doing, it will be very interesting. We are hell-bent on making a positive contribution to the community." Keep your eye on 421 East Pine. Visit www.postcardsfromthemoon.com for more info or call (206) 861-1971.

Lady Liberty surrounded by men in black at Area 51.

Area 51--401 E Pine St. Well powder me Roswell, need we get any more overt? This mod Jetsons' of a store consigns Bauhaus housewares and fake chia-grass to designer furniture, like their egg pod outdoor lounge chair that seals shut to keep out the rain. Owners Shannon and Jeffrey focus on consigning top condition '60s and '70s modern items for small spaces. Even their birdhouses are modern (I imagine their maker is German, wearing tiny spectacles and a black turtleneck, saying, "Why do zee little birdies have to live in zose tacky "kountry" homes. Mein are metal cubist apartments for the birdie of zee new millennium!) Wander through target posters (just like the CIA uses) while listening to ambient house music pouring out of Blueroom speakers, an apparently immediate drool for those of you up on electronica.

Abstract--If this were a painting, I'd call it Store, In Motion. The constant flux of antiques, art glass, cherubs, and bargain trinkets is like the whoops-a-daisy spill of Sunday morning champagne. Abstract is a store that doesn't act like one. Stop by to chat with the great guys that own it, or just hang out there. You may uncover secrets of your family genealogy tucked in a folder on the floor, or a photo of that alien spacecraft at Papoose Lake. (508 E. Pine, (206) 861-8400, open seven days a week 11 a.m. - 7 p.m.)

All conspiracies involve greed and power. This usually translates into oil. You can see the history of oil at the General Petroleum Museum. Used as an event space, you may call for a tour by appointment when they aren't catering up a storm. Phone: 323-4789.

Le Frock--317 East Pine. Cozy to almost elflike proportions, Le Frock's been magically swinging out dazzling digs for 10 years. (Monday - Saturday 11 a.m. - 7 p.m., Sunday noon - 5p.m.) Up two blocks from Le Frock on Pine is Hello Gorgeous. They mock us humans with their ultra cute Paul Frank monkey pajamas and rainbow sock puppets. Put on these fun flannels and cozy up to a monolith in style.

Groggy from your recent alien abduction? Or perhaps a lack of food? At Groggy on Pine, you'll find the ultimate in club wear in three sizes: Small, smaller, and starving. It's a hip conspiracy against hips, if you ask me. You'll have to stagger there on your own.

Now head for the bright lights of Broadway. The signs are all here at Red Light, from fringed Kennedy banners to multiple Elvis shrines, this store fronts their conspiracy innuendos with "his and her" floors of used and new clothing. They'll even sell you full-sized angel wings to cover up any pesky alien abnormalities. Open Monday - Saturday 11 a.m. - 8 p.m., Sunday 11 a.m. - 7p.m. 312 Broadway Ave. E. (206) 329-2200.

Find some answers and all the questions in the varied publications at Steve's Broadway News. I found some light reading on the government's involvement with anthrax inoculations - get this: from last year. You'll find all the usual rags and others quite fringe, but Steve's truly provides reading material for everyone. Open 8 a.m. - midnight every day at 204 Broadway E, (206) 324-7323.

The Ourodoros--If not part of our little alien conspiracy, this store certainly focuses on the otherworldly realm, maybe even uberworldy. Apparently even the spirit world needs supplies, but they do tarot, rune, palm or astrological readings. Maybe THEY can tell us where to find Amelia. 812 E. Roy St. (across the street from Harvard Exit). Open noon - 8 p.m. Tuesday - Sunday.

SOIL Gallery--Getting to SOIL feels like a covert operation. Find the sign and go through the industrial strength red door that looks double locked but isn't. Then proceed down a dark ramp into...a gym. Walk across a room of ancient Nautilus and free weights, stale testosterone still lingering, to the womblike art installation Inflate, by artists Rachel Johnston, Paul Davis, Sarah Morris, Sean Vale, and Leslie Clague. As you walk through the rooms, the inflated art subtly interacts with your movements with sound and light. Go here at the very least because there is absolutely nothing to buy. If you just have to buy something, you can attend their annual auction on December 1. In the 1205 Building on 12th & Pike. For more information about SOIL or their auction go to www.soilart.org.

Remember, folks, the truth is out there but they will try to expunge it every step of the way. There are enclaves to unravel and crannies yet veiled. Heed my advice and head for the den of intrigue that is Capitol Hill.

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