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Roger's Home Journal
Roger's Home JournalVery Special Ladder Instructions
By Roger Faris
Jul 18, 2002 -- In the mid-afternoon of July 1 someone used a pair of bolt cutters to destroy a padlock and steal three extension ladders and a twelve-step, three-legged orchard ladder from the Phinney Neighborhood Association. These were part of the Well Home Program Tool Library collection, which was started in 1977. The ladders, along with all of our tools and books, have been a great resource for people throughout the Seattle area. The idea is that through cooperation and sharing we can help each other maintain our homes and communities.Whoever took the ladders could have made arrangements to borrow them, and still has the option of simply bringing them back. A motivation to do so could be genuine remorse and the realization that stealing things from a community center is pretty low- down and mean. It's more likely, though, that perpetrator is totally self-centered and has no imagination at all. In that case the ladders will not be available for others to borrow this summer. Also, our outdoor ladder storage area, which has never before been targeted by thieves, will no longer be a good option.
Part of my role as tool librarian is to offer advice on how to use the tools and equipment. In this instance, I didn't have the usual opportunity to provide instructions on ladder safety. It is possible, though not probable, that this unknown person is about to get started on a building maintenance project. I hate to think of what might come to pass from making some mistake in how the ladders are used. I'd better pass along these "very special" ladder instructions:
The ladders you stole are the super-extra-heavy-duty type, so it doesn't matter how much weight you ask them to hold. Two thousand pounds or more are just fine. They have the new, patented "terra-grip" feet, so you can use them on uneven or soft ground with no worry that the ladder will ever tip over. Don't pay any attention to the angle indicator printed on the side of each ladder. Those symbols are too complicated for you to understand, and the chances of the base slipping out or the whole thing falling over backwards are too small for you to worry about.
Using aluminum ladders near power lines shouldn't be a concern for you. Someday, further along in your career, you may have an encounter with high voltage (perhaps in Texas or Florida), but don't think too much about it just now. Drugs and alcohol are fine, too. You already know that. You're probably quick, and more or less invincible. If you start to fall, you will certainly grab something; maybe a power line?
When you're way up high (far out, man!) on a ladder, the last thing you want to do is climb back down just to move it a couple of feet. Instead, always just lean out a little more to reach the area that's beyond you fingertips. As for getting up to the very peak of the building, go ahead and stand on the top rung. Those warning notices obviously don't apply to you, and besides, it's always good to question authority.
Well, I'm sure glad to have had this opportunity to communicate with the thief. You now know how to use the equipment you took. Perhaps your project is done, or maybe you're in the hospital, or jail. In any case, if you'll arrange for the ladders to reappear, I could just tell the police that they can drop their investigation. I'm sure they'd like to get on to other cases, since this one is probably taking up so much of their time and resources.
Roger Faris is the director of the Phinney Neighborhood Association Well Home Program and Project Impact Earthquake Retrofit Program (and a Research Associate with the Save The World Institute). He can be reached at (206) 789-4993.
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| ammar amer | Feb 26, 2003 | u.a.e | engineer |
