Good Food

Good Food: Blue Onion Bistro

By Zachary D. Lyons

While I grant you that the entire planet is littered with cars, there is still something quintessentially American about the automobile. We Yanks have an obsession with them, to the utter and complete disregard for our environment, our government’s ability to tax and serve us, and to the point that we abuse our solitary superpower status to defend our access to cheap gas.

That said, I do miss the old service stations that actually gave you service with your fill-up—checking your oil and washing your windows, and even replacing your clutch—as opposed to merely offering you a Mondo-Gulp® 84-ounce cherry cola flavored cup of slush and a three-day old hot dog to go with your smokes, beer and flammables. Many of those old service stations have now become restaurants. And they all seem to be truly American restaurants, as if their souls required it.

Closed down a garage, and put up a restaurant (ooh, la, la, la)

Blue Onion Bistro is one of the finest examples of gas station turned restaurant. In addition to keeping its menu true to Holy American Gas-guzzler, this University District eatery is literally a shrine to Americana, kitsch, and the Ebay lovin’, stuff collecting American masses.

Susan Jensen chuckles as she points out the latest funky tidbit her business partner, Scott Simpson, brought into the place. Noting the outrageous lack on any Revere Ware displayed in the dining room, I did muse about my childhood collection of Wacky Packages. Scott has a huge, uncut sheet of them framed on the back dining room wall. There are old toys, magazine ads, movie posters, lava lamps, and even an uncut sheet of History on the U.S. Monopoly title cards. I could spend at least a couple of hours just exploring the magnificent array of stuff this pair (well, mostly Scott) has assembled to decorate Blue Onion.

I did spend a couple of hours eating lunch there recently. Sitting at an outdoor table, under the old gas station carport, I simply melted into the peacefulness of the place, the sunny day, the charming company, and the wonderful food. We were simply swept away by a menu built around American comfort food. Though Scott was classically trained in French cooking, he says, “you can’t go wrong with American food.” While Scott is largely responsible for the entree menu, and Susan the dessert menu, they share the cooking duties. And boy do they cook. On a recent Saturday, the two were working faster than a... let’s just say fast... while timing each table’s courses just right on their dueling ranges.

Comfort Food for an Uncomfortable America

The menu is built around old favorites and classics. Says Scott, “these are the dishes my mother and grandmother used to make.” Then with a guilty tone in his voice, he adds, “I just figured out how to make them better.” Okay, he won’t be showing this review to his mom, but he certainly has figured out how to make excellent Mac and Cheese, Chicken A La King, Tuna Casserole and Fishsticks—items rarely seen on other menus, but elevated here to the status of fine dining.

To start, try the Chicken Popper Rolls. Scott began with a jalapeno popper. He tinkered with it for a while, like he has with so many dishes, until he managed to combine two (of which I understand there are thousands) of his favorite foods—egg rolls and poppers—into an extraordinary delight. These things are huge, and like the wise-assed menu commentary immodestly states, they’re “kinda like other poppers, except ours are good.” It is that fundamental philosophy that food should, above all else, be good and fun, which Susan and Scott bring in abundance to Blue Onion.

Take Uncle Spock’s Salmon Fishsticks, for instance. Said Scott, “I grew up loving the concept of fishsticks, though most of them were terrible.” So he redesigned them, using troll caught salmon, and the result is bliss. Again, they are huge. (Remember, we’re talking uh-Merican food here. Small portions are for, well, foreigners, I guess.) My companion on a dinner visit observed with a curious eye that all of the salads used romaine lettuce. “Heck,” said Scott, “I like romaine.” Besides, every Nouveau cuisine restaurant uses “mixed wild spring greens” these days (which are rarely from the spring, and never wild). But Blue Onion is about oldveau cuisine, and for Scott, it’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright... romaine.

The Blue Ribbon Mac and Cheese—their most requested recipe—is chewy and gooey and cheesy, and it packs a little extra punch, spiked with blue cheese. The Chicken A La King Royale is a delicious, peppery, hearty dish which puts those Swanson frozen pot pies to shame. And the Blue Onion Tuna Casserole is so good, it could perhaps lure Bill Gates across 520 from his Medina fortress to the U-District for it.

Dr. Scott’s Maple Duck made this duck fan grin ear-to-ear. Cooked and served with maple syrup and sausage, this is not your average duck. Served with great roasted potatoes and nice spinach, it just plain rocks. Scott said that he always liked how the pancake syrup tasted on breakfast sausage, and he applied that flavor to duck. Amen! The Town Dumpling, while paying homage to that other by-gone American institute, the town dump, is actually an exceptionally well executed potato gnocchi dish. It will keep your vegetarian and your in-need-of-higher-browed-food friends happy while you scarf done the basics.

Desserts are a daily mix of seasonals and standards. We enjoyed the terrific seasonal cobbler, using Washington peaches and fresh raspberries from a farm in Carnation. The brownie sundae is an excellent standard, rich and chocolatie, with a big dollop of vanilla ice cream, it varies slightly from night to night at Susan’s whim. And if her whim cooks up a Rice Crispy Treat, try it.

Like Scott said, you can¹t go wrong with American food, and in the case of Blue Onion Bistro, it seems you can’t go wrong with anything on their menu. With the menu changing a little every three to four months, I imagine I will have to return again and again to do more research.

So God Bless America—where great food and big cars keep us fat and happy.

Blue Onion Bistro, 5801 Roosevelt Way NE, 729-0579, Lunch Tuesday - Friday, 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m., Dinner Tuesday - Saturday, 5-10 p.m., Sunday, 5-9 p.m. Reservations accepted. $$-$$$

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